“Now, my only suggestion is to date for a while, before you ask her…you know, just take your time…”
Jason jumped in, “I was thinking about asking her in two weeks…”
“Or that works too,” conceded my dad.
The two talked a bit more, finished their meals and headed their respective ways, but not before an honest to goodness “welcome to the family” hug from my dad. I didn’t see Jason until later that evening and, being the joker he is, decided to tell me how the meeting couldn’t have gone any worse and this and that—I felt panicked. What does this mean? What do I do now? My over-reactive thoughts were taking over when my jerk of a boyfriend stopped them.
“It went great. He said yes!” I sighed a sigh of relief that everyone was happy and in one piece and shoved him playfully. I can now say that after 19 years I know the very second he’s pulling my leg and I dish it right back.
“Allison! There’s a car! You are making me nervous…”
We were driving in downtown Pittsburgh, trying to make our way to the East Liberty Presbyterian Church for a Wednesday night service called a Taize service. Over the course of living in the Steel City while in art school, I learned to drive a bit more aggressively than, well, what he was comfortable with.
Look, you can’t wait for people to make their move—you have to keep traffic moving. Make a decision, hesitation will just cause more chaos in “multi-lane plus exit ramps everywhere” kind of situations. Jason was terrified. He already had mini panic attacks whenever I drove anywhere, but now, all the flashing lights and traffic lights in weird places and signs—he was an absolute wreck. Nothing will test trust in a relationship quite like inner city driving with no GPS or smart phones. Actual road maps and Mapquest paper printouts, people. Mapquest.
It was December 14th, my Aunt Lori’s birthday, my late great-grandmother’s birthday, and my best friend Anne’s birthday! Because I already had a connection to Pittsburgh and he learned that this Taize movement was being practiced at a church there, he thought it would be a fun adventure for the two of us to drive out there, attend the service, maybe have some dinner and drive back. No funny business.
After handing Jason a paper bag (not really) and ignoring his freak-outs (that part is true), we finally found the church. It was beautiful.
We parked on the street and made our way to the section of the cathedral where the Taize service was being held and found a pew to sit in. I asked Jason for his coat. I could set his winter jacket along with mine on the other side of me so they were out of our way.
“No, I’ll just hold on to it.”
Okay, weirdo.
The beautiful repetitive chanting and simple melodies in French, English, and other languages filled the air. People were playing instruments all around us, we were surrounded. A flute, a french horn, clarinet, strings, seemed like one of everything was echoing in this sacred space! The candles and icons, along with “sails” signifying the movement of the Holy Spirit decorated the front of the sanctuary. It was a beautiful sight. The closest thing I’ve seen to the church scene in Baz Luhrman’s Romeo + Juliet. Only there was no teenage angst and forbidden love, no fake death and suicide. Just me and Jason, our coats, and a bunch of strangers worshipping together. It was lovely.
Once the service ended, we gathered our coats and headed back for the car. I was hungry. Starving, in fact. I don’t think hangry was a term we used in 2005, but if it was then I was it.
But Jason wanted to go up the incline at Mount Washington and see the cityscape.
“Do we have to go right now? Can’t we do that after we find a place to eat?” I asked, maybe whining ever so slightly.
“I really want to see it now though, why don’t we just find somewhere to eat afterwards?” So we’re back in the car, and I had forgotten that the easiest thing would be for me to park Jason’s car down at Station Square and then take the incline up the mountain, see the sights, and take it back down to eat at one of the many restaurants in the Square. But I chose the hard way. I missed the exit (probably because I was starving) and I found myself winding my way up the mountain. I was annoyed.
My mistake, but Jason wasn’t helping the situation.
“Is that the Enterprise Ship?”
“What?”
“The Enterprise, you know, off of Star Trek.”
“No! What are you talking about? It’s an overlook, it’s not the Enterprise.”
“I think it’s the Enterprise.”
“Jason, it is not a replica of the Enterprise sticking out the side of the mountain. There’s one down that way too.”
“Well it looks like the Enterprise.”
“Oh my gosh, I’m getting so annoyed with you right now! I’m trying to find the road I’m supposed to be on, I’m starving, it’s not the freaking Enterprise! Why can’t we just eat first!?”
I made my way back down the mountain, where I was supposed to be in the first place and we found the parking lot at Station Square. I just wanted to get this over with. I would be in a much better mood once we ate. Plus, it was freezing cold. All the peace and renewal I felt from the Taize service had gone right out the car window.
As we boarded in the incline, we started to laughed a little at our bickering and any uptightness we felt with each other. At the top we paid for just the one way (I’m not sure why) and trekked out on to the “Enterprise”.
I pointed out the Art Institute building, Heinz field, the Point, the PPG building, all the places I could remember from the previous year of living there. The night skyline of Pittsburgh from the overlook is pretty amazing. Chattering teeth and all. I looked out on the buildings that stood across the river and started to say to Jason “I think I knew someone who told me they got engaged while riding on the incline—how stupid is that!? With all the graffiti in those cars, and it’s kind of dirt—”
“Well, would you marry me?” I turned my gaze to Jason, whose hand, unbeknownst to me, had been fumbling around in his coat pocket, trying to find the little gray box and open it the right way (while I was going on my rant about who should get engaged where and Lord knows what else). And who now (with it too slippery to kneel) was my boyfriend, standing beside me holding up the box that held a single princess cut diamond ring inside.
Jason waited, bracing himself for what I might say next. Maybe I was wondering the same.
Watch for the tenth and final installment of “How We Met” coming soon.
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